Two Blind
Pilots
Two blind pilots both are wearing
dark glasses, one is using a guide dog, and the other is tapping his way along the
aisle with a cane. People laugh nervously as the men enter the cockpit, and
then the engines start up. The passengers begin looking around nervously to see
if this is just a practical joke.
The plane moves faster and faster down the
runway and the people sitting in the window seats realize they’re headed
straight for the water at the edge of the airport. As it begins to look as
though the plane will go into the water, people start to scream.
At that
moment, the plane lifts smoothly into the air. The passengers relax and laugh a
little, and soon all start to relax. In the cockpit, one of the bling pilots
turns to the other and says, “You know, Bob, one of these days, they’re going to scream too late and we’re all going to die.”
1. What do the pilots bring on the plane with them?
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2. How do the pilots know when to lift off?
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3. In the beginning, do the passengers think the
pilots are joking?
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4. Are the pilots really blind?
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What
Time is It?
A homeless man
laid down to sleep in the park. He had been sleeping for about five minutes,
when a couple walked by. The man stopped, woke up the homeless man, and asked
him, “Excuse me. Do you know what time it is?” the homeless man replied, “I’m
sorry - I don’t have a watch, so I don’t know the time.” The man apologized for
waking the homeless man and the couple walked away.
The homeless man laid down
again, and after a few minutes, went back to sleep. Just then, a woman, who was
out walking her dog, shook the man’s shoulder until he woke up again. The woman
said, “I’m sorry to trouble you, but I’m afraid I’ve lost my watch. Do you
happen to know the time?” The homeless man was a little annoyed at being woken
up again, but he politely told the woman that he didn’t have a watch and didn’t
know the time.
After the woman had done, the homeless man had an idea. He
opened the bag that contained all his possessions and got out a pen, a piece of
paper and some string. On the paper he wrote down, ‘I do not have a watch. I do
now know the time.’ He then hung the paper around his neck and eventually fell
back asleep. After about 15 minutes, a policeman who was walking through the
park, noticed the man asleep on the bench and the sign around his neck. He woke
up the homeless man and said, “I read your sign. I thought you’d like to know
that it’s 2:30 p.m.”
1. What was the homeless man’s idea?
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2. How many people asked the man what time it
was?
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3. What is the twist?
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